Set workplace boundaries that work for you
Two young female professionals engaged in courageous conversations about work boundaries.
Do you have work boundaries?
In therapy it’s common to discuss family dynamics, relationship boundaries and how it affects us and others, but work boundaries sometimes are last on the list when it comes to wellness. Work boundaries and work-life are becoming increasingly important to employees and many are beginning to consider it as part of their wellness and work benefits. Recently, the U.S. Surgeon General Dr. Vivek Murthy released the report Framework for Workplace Mental Health & Well-Being highlighting the damaging effects of a toxic workplace and that 84% of employees reported that at least one workplace factor had a negative impact on their mental health. Employees want to know how their mental health will be supported at work, how employers manage burnout and how can they continue to grow professionally and feel valued. Additionally, employees want to learn to create boundaries and how to use them in their work place to feel less overwhelm, confident and successful in their job.
What exactly are work boundaries and why do we need them? There are different kinds of boundaries to consider when you want to implement a boundary at work. Is it a physical boundary? A physical boundary relates to your work space environment and your body. An example of a physical boundary might be: needing to close the door to do your work-signaling that you aren't available, taking a solo lunch instead of a group lunch or wearing your headphones to visibly alert people that you are busy.
Some folks consider creating work boundaries when they find themselves feeling hurt, confused, disrespected, are feeling burnt out, and want to improve working relationships. Think of a work place boundary as your line, where people know where they stand and what to expect. Work place boundaries define the limits and responsibilities of our collegues and managers. Boundaries can define what are acceptable behaviors and clarifiy expectations. Now, what happens when a person crosses your line? Will you adhere to your boundary, will there be pushback? What do you do? These questions may not be easy to answer, but it certainly can give you a moment of pause and reflection about your work life. Learning to set work place boundaries means you will be establishing healthy work place practices.
Consider some healthy work place practices you would like to see. Are you taking work home? Do you leave on time? Do you check your email after-hours? Do you have difficulty saying no to your manager? Can you separate your work life from your personal life? If you said yes to any of those questions and feel out of sorts with the way you’re currently working, you might consider establishing a work boundary. Work boundaries can be one of the most difficult boundaries to create because at the core of it, many of us fear we might upset our employer, we fear we might not be liked or fear that we are being seen in a negative light.
I’m here to let you know that you are not being negative if you are expressing your desire and what you need to thrive in your work environment. Setting healthy work boundaries is a skill that we all can learn and is an important part of our self-care and job satisfaction.
Why is it important to have work boundaries?
With increasing work place demands and staff shortages, work boundaries have become more critical with how we manage our time at work. We might be expected to work harder, faster and take on more than we can do on a given day. The importance of boundaries can’t be understated, if done well it can create a respectful and engaging work culture. Check out some examples below on why work boundaries can be beneficial.
Work boundaries helps us to respectfully communicate and interact with our colleagues and managers in a productive way. When we know what is expected of us and what to do next, it decreases communication confusion. Employees can work together while still managing to focus on their individual work responsibilities.
Healthy boundaries increase connection with our colleagues and others, it doesn’t cut people out. Respectful communication as a boundary allows people to feel safe enough to speak when feeling vulnerable, creative, provide feedback and constructive criticism. When we feel valued, heard and safe enough to speak, we trust that our opinions and ideas belong in our work space.
Creating work place boundaries enhances your resiliency by protecting yourself from taking on too much. Boundaries can lead to more autonomy and self-advocacy to finish your project instead of volunteering for more or being voluntold what to do.
When you have work boundaries you can be more productive and focus on those priority tasks with minimal distraction. You start to say no to projects that can’t be done in a reasonable amount of time and you start to feel okay about saying no or not right now.
You can begin to experience less stress while you focus on your priority task and not engaging in inefficient multitasking (which can lead to increased stress and problems with focus).
Boundaries help keep you organized and manage your workload.
When you can manage your workload and accomplish your goals, let’s face it, you start to feel confident about your skills and feel successful.
Setting boundaries at work might not come naturally, but understanding what you value and learning the skills to clearly communicate your needs may increase job satisfaction.
What happens if I don’t have healthy work boundaries?
All is not lost if you believe you don’t have adequate boundaries at work. Creating and adhering to your boundaries takes practice and deep internal work if self advocacy does not come easy. The examples below are some situations we find ourselves in when we begin to realize our boundaries aren’t so clear.
You might find it difficult to recognize your own signs of burnout.
When you don’t practice healthy work boundaries you are at risk for burnout.
Burnout often happens when employees take on additional work, overextend themselves, have difficulty saying no and understanding their capacity for work.
Without boundaries, your behaviors can lead to overworking, poor communication, resentment, low morale, quiet quitting, not completing your work responsibilities, feeling apathetic, dissatisfied, unable to identify what you enjoy, feeling irritable, cynical and unhappy with your employer.
You might notice some changes in your mood, thoughts, stress levels and attitudes towards work when you reflect on your challenging work circumstances.
Mental health issues such as anxiety or depression can result from not having work boundaries to protect your wellbeing.
You may have difficulty asserting yourself, avoiding direct communication and difficult conversations.
Managers and/or colleagues may assume that you’re doing well if you haven’t communicated your needs.
What you allow to happen at work, you might indirectly encourage. For instance, if you say yes to all projects and take work home with you, you might unintentionally communicate that you are fine with taking extra work on and home with you.
Strategies to get you started on work boundaries.
Now that you have some understanding about workplace boundaries its benefits and challenges, let’s consider some strategies to start developing them. Think about your time and what you value at work; how are you using your time? What are those burning work questions that you have? What do you like about yourself while at work? What do you need in order to get your work done? Reflecting on the aforementioned questions can help you tease out what’s important and identify what you need to work sustainably. Be sure to start small; remember that small boundaries can have a big impact. You can start implementing small boundaries in areas you think you have some influence over such as when to take a break or creating an environment to focus on a task. If setting boundaries and saying no is hard for you, keep in mind that many successful professionals have learned to say no when appropriate. No is an empowering word and important to use when needed in your career and overall well-being. Over time and with practice you will start to feel less self-doubt and insecurity; feeling more decisive, confident and relaxed with your approach to boundary setting. Some ideas to get you started are below:
If your work feels like it’s too much, consider modifying your work flow so that your work feels more manageable.
Consider having an hour of uninterrupted time and silencing work notifications so you can focus.
Designate your first thirty minutes to one hour of your week to prioritize your calendar for the week.
Negotiate priorities when they are conflicting. What is priority and what can wait? Can you ask for support when priorities are conflicting and you’re feeling stuck?
We all want to be helpful and be a team player, but consider finishing your work first before helping others or taking on new tasks. That can look like: “I can help you with your project once I finish with mine. I’ll be available tomorrow morning to help”.
If you have difficulty saying no to a manager when a request is made, an example you can respond with can sound like “I currently have X, Y and Z going on, but as soon as those are done I can start on your task”.
You don’t have to wait for your work environment to turn negative or for you to experience burnout to set a work boundary. You can start implementing boundaries to prevent stress to make things more manageable in your work space.
Take time to notice how you are feeling and how your body is responding to implementing work boundaries and strategies. Where in your body can you identify when feeling overwhelm and when setting your boundary? When you’ve had success with a boundary, where in your body do you feel it? How is it different from pre-boundary? Pro-tip: Recognize that discomfort is normal when trying something new and it doesn’t indicate that something is wrong.
Celebrate your successful boundary! If it doesn’t happen as soon as you’d like it to, know that boundary setting is an ongoing practice and you will get there.
Our workplace has an enormous impact on our mental health.
Feeling calm, supported and valued shouldn’t just be a goal in our personal lives. Creating healthy relationships in the workplace is just as important as other areas in our life.
While creating a new way of communicating and changing behaviors may be uncomfortable and an uncharted territory, taking those first few actionable steps will empower you and build your self-confidence. Part of developing more confidence and self-advocacy means you will need to be introspective and specific about your work needs. What makes you feel supported, calm or healthy at work? It might feel strange at first, maybe even selfish if you are not used to prioritizing your needs first. Some aspects of work will be within your control and other aspects will not, you will need to discover how you want to progress professionally at your current job or perhaps another. If we want changes in our work life, we need to say something or do something differently; that responsibility and accountability falls on us.
Our work environment has an enormous impact on our mental health. Employees don’t experience mental health challenges in isolation. Employers play a role, too — both good and bad. Employee work challenges are not necessarily an individual problem either; there are multiple systems, bureaucracy, relationship dynamics at play that lead to work mental health issues. Advocating for yourself is the place to start; it typically starts by verbalizing your concerns, collaborating in relationships and creating that work boundary. If advocating for changes in the larger systems is what’s needed, start connecting with your colleagues and have those important conversations. You’d be amazed at what a group of colleagues with a common goal can accomplish.
As you continue on your work boundaries journey keep in mind that a sign of growth is realizing you are capable of tolerating some discomfort and appreciating the good, but have less tolerance for instability and chaos. Remember that having healthier work boundaries is a process and you are capable of starting with one boundary at a time and assess how it is going for you. When making boundary changes, progress over perfection is what you are striving for. I encourage you to think about your career goals, wins and what needs adjusting. You may be pleasantly surprised in your ability to take action and notice a decrease in anxiety and stress levels. Your colleagues and/or managers may adjust for the better and also be willing to go an extra mile to work respectfully and collaboratively. In the presence of respectful interaction and relationships, having meaningful or purposeful work and feeling cared for goes a long way in sustaining our work life.
If you’re ready to learn how you can implement work boundaries, let’s connect and get you started.
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