Thrive through Imposter Syndrome
Professional woman of color working along side male professional together in a meeting
Imposter Syndrome. You may have heard the term more recently in social media. Maybe your friends have talked about it and maybe you yourself have experienced it. So what is it? Developed by Dr. Clance, Imposter Syndrome is known as phenomenon of doubting your own hard-won success, feeling like a fraud in certain spaces, that at any moment you will be found out because you don’t belong, and you only got there through sheer luck. Imposter syndrome prevents successful people from internalizing and enjoying their accomplishments. This kind of self-destructive thought pattern can also infiltrate our feelings about ourselves, our abilities, how we navigate our relationships with people, and the decisions we make. Feeling like a fraud make us think our skills and experience are subpar, that they are not special and therefore don’t deserve the recognition. These intense feelings can prevent us from applying to jobs, sharing our ideas, talking about it, taking risks to pursue our passions, asking about our performance because our fears will be confirmed, acknowledging our sucesses even with positive feedback. This is more than just being humble or modest; these crippling thoughts convince us that we can’t triumph in comparison to others and are convinced that we are imposters.
Some of the common signs of Imposter Syndrome include:
an inability to realistically assess your competence and skills
attributing your success to external factors
berating or criticizing your performance
fear of not living up to expectations
overachieving
perfectionism
procrastination
sabotaging your own success
feeling under qualified and in over your head
setting unrealistic goals and feeling disappointed when you can’t reach them
Impostor syndrome is more common than many may realize. Research shows up to 82% of people report they have felt like an impostor at some point, according to the Journal of General Internal Medicine. These feelings are particularly common among minority groups and women. In many arenas diverse voices can be minimal to nearly absent. The lack of role models for marginalized communities impacts feelings of belonging in many environments, but most notably in work environments. As a woman and a woman of color myself, we are at increased risk of experiencing imposter syndrome if we don’t see examples of people in powerful positions who look like us, share our background and are succeeding. BIPOC who have experienced racism and systemic oppression have been directly or indirectly told that they are not deserving of success. Systemic racism can reinforce Imposter Syndrome since it involves wrestling with both internal and external societal messages about our abilities. Grappling with incidents of microagressions, being questioned about credentials, university attended and if they are at their job due to affirmative action are all examples of how systems can reinforce Imposter Syndrome for BIPOC.
For children of immigrants and first generation college graduates or professionals, it can be a source of pride to be the first in our family to accomplish our goals; however, there is an invisible pressure to feeling successful. Earning accolades and accomplishments can bring feelings of overwhelm. This added invisible pressure can make you feel as if your whole family’s success is dependent on you because you are expected to represent your family. Children of immigrants who are succeeding may think their dreams are not their own, their family may adopt their dream too and they not only succeed for themselves, but succeed for their entire family. Additionally, due to upbringing they may have internalized that hard work is considered the only way to get ahead. BIPOC with imposter syndrome feelings may tend to normalize overworking, fear a lack of financial or emotional instability if they don’t overwork, they don’t complain and work harder to prove themselves. First generation children or first time professionals may strive to work towards perfection or procrastinate, might be overly concerned that one mistake could ruin it all and confirm again that they do not belong. Further, the lack of other BIPOC role models in these spaces and fear of never being good enough compounds feelings of being a fraud. As BIPOC individual starts to experience success and earning achievements, they can second guess their decisions, minimize earned accomplishments, doubt the praise and positive feedback they receive because of the narrative that their success must not be valid. It’s important to recognize that there are also toxic work environments where a person’s work is devalued and not recognized —that is different from experiencing imposter syndrome (which is more of an internal process) and it is important to note the difference.
Successful people we place on a pedestal experience imposter syndrome too, they are very much like us and there’s no fundamental difference.
If you’re struggling with imposter syndrome be curious about its origins. Often times we learned and believed the narratives we told ourselves somewhere along the way. As a child you may have felt like an imposter if you were frequently compared to a sibling, relative, or family friend. Perhaps as a child you learned that it wasn’t allowed to experience feelings like sadness or anger, and you had to “wear a mask” and present yourself as calm and collected. Those childhood messages could have started something like this, “Look how friendly and outgoing your cousin is, why can’t you be more like her?” or “Look at all I’ve accomplished, you need to be like me and work harder”. These are just some examples of imposter syndrome roots and being frequently compared to others is one possible route to developing imposter syndrome. When you have imposter syndrome, you tend to prioritize others needs and concerns about their impressions of you over caring for yourself. Those messages may have helped shaped the narrative that your needs are small in comparison to others, which could evolve into people pleasing, perfectionism and avoiding in investing in yourself.
So now that you have an idea of what imposter syndrome is and how it may present in your life, what do you do with this information? Recognize and understand that feelings aren’t facts. Feelings of inadequacy are normal from time to time, but it doesn’t mean they are true. When we think of our narratives and how long we have held on to our way of thinking, we may make them out to be true. It takes time and energy to start to shift your imposter syndrome mindset, but it is a doable and necessary first step. One way to start addressing imposter syndrome is to talk about how you’re feeling, either with a trusted friend or a mental health professional. It might feel scary to open up and receive feedback and may feel the urge to avoid it altogether, but you might learn that you are not alone in your feelings and imposter syndrome is relatively common. Challenge your own standards by which you are measuring yourself. Be curious and notice if you have negative thought patterns. If you do, speak kindly to your self like you would speak to a friend. Keep failure in perspective and focus on what you’ve learned. Explore your own beliefs about failure, success and reflect on your thoughts. Are you thoughts accurate? Could you be exaggerating? What evidence do you have to come to your conclusion? By reflecting on your thoughts and challenging some of your automatic negative assumptions, you can interrupt the habit of negative thinking. Document and look over all your accomplishments; for example review and update your resume, those are undisputed facts that you, yes you accomplished. When experiencing self-doubt, look back at that list of accomplishments. There are times where we feel anxious and don't have all the answers or we wait for that perfect moment to make a move; you may not have all the answers, but take that leap of faith anyway. You may think you don’t deserve that job, apply for it anyway. Don’t think your article is good enough? Publish it anyways. Don’t think you deserve a raise? Negotiate anyways. Take a first step no matter how small or trivial you think it is. Don’t tell yourself no, make them tell you no. Avoiding the issue can bring you resentment down the line, make the change and be temporarily uncomfortable. As you start to make changes you will begin to trust yourself more and build your self-confidence. Although Imposter Syndrome can feel exclusively like an internal process, work environments and work leaders need to also address the external process—systemic bias and racism that exacerbates Imposter Syndrome. Inclusive workplaces that address systemic bias and create work place equity can help BIPOC thrive and channel their self-doubt into positive motivation, feeling respected and valued.
Remember you are not alone. You may feel as you are the only one with imposter syndrome, but keep in mind that you are not; roughly 82% of people experience feelings of fraud and inadequacy. We may observe others from the outside, but since we may not know them intimately, we are often left to conclude we are just different when we are left with our insecurities. Remember we are not seeing the complete picture. Successful people we place on a pedestal have experienced imposter syndrome too, they are very much like us and there’s no fundamental difference. Continue to call out your imposter syndrome thinking. Once you are aware of imposter syndrome, you can harness those thoughts, take action and no longer be paralyzed by it. You will notice that you will begin making better choices about setting boundaries and allow more space for self-care. You will also begin to appreciate what you have achieved and what you’ve done for yourself. Ease and freedom from Imposter Syndrome are within your reach when you commit to your well-being. You are capable and you belong in your space, and as a BIPOC you are making room for others like you. For additional information on Imposter Syndrome, you can check out my latest workshop collaboration.
If Imposter Syndrome is a blocking your success, let’s work through those barriers to help you thrive. Book your consultation below.
